My name is Br. Moses of the Resurrection. I entered the novitiate on April 30th 2019, when I was 24.

I first started to feel drawn to the things of God when I was four years old. My family lives near to the Basilica of the National Shrine of Mary Help, Help of Christians, at Holy Hill. At that time, we would frequently attend daily Mass at Holy Hill. Upon returning home, as I fondly remember, I would often don my “vestments” (one of my Dad’s black tee-shirts) and “play” Mass. However, during my grade school years, my family became more active in our diocesan parish. It was there though my pastors that I first came to learn about the spiritualty of diocesan priesthood. During my junior high to early high school years, I began to split my time half at my parish and half at Holy Hill. At that time, I began to discern a difference between the way in which my diocesan pastor lived his priesthood and the way in which the friars lived their priesthood. I found myself drawn to the friars for two reasons. First, the fraternity of the community life (“these men love and support each other and they do it together”). Second, the spirituality of Carmel (“these men know God in a special way and they want to help others to come to know Him in that special way”). During my high school years, I meet occasionally with a Carmelite spiritual director, I was involved in a youth group, and I also attended discernment retreats at my local diocesan major seminary. However, by far the most fruitful activity for my discernment in which I participated was serving daily Mass. By the conclusion of high school, I was committed to more formal discernment and formation with the Discalced Carmelites.

The Washington Province sponsored me to attend a four-year undergraduate program at St. John Vianney College Seminary in St. Paul, Minnesota. During these years I spent the academic year in formation at St. John Vianney and the summers living in community with the friars at Holy Hill and studying works of the Carmelite Saints. Upon graduation I formally applied to initial formation with the province.

Our vocation gives witness to two unique “transforming unions” or “marriages” within the life of the Church. The first is a “marriage” of the Divine with the human. Through our life in Carmel, God draws and forms each of us in such a way that I can touch Him and be touched by Him in my brothers. Yet, while God is carrying out His work of divinization and redemption in each of us, He respects the unique person that is each of us and all of the talents, weaknesses, strengths, and shortcomings which that person brings. Thus, the community becomes a privileged place of encounter between me, my brother, and God. In one man, I meet both Jesus Christ and my brother. Second, there is a “marriage” between solitude and solidarity. In Carmel, I am at one and the same time alone with my God and in solidarity with my brothers. The One complements and draws me ever closer to the other and vice versa. This intimate friendship is the heart of our spirituality.

To a young man who is feeling a tug towards religious life, I would offer the following encouragement from our Carmelite saints. First, Br. Lawrence of the Resurrection says “Be with Him always. (Letter 13)” God lives in you by virtue of your Baptism. He is already with you in everything you do. Now, consciously turn to Him – “Be with Him always!” Your vocation and its discernment are not your own – it’s His gift. He has the power to make clear to you what will fulfil you and make you happy. Since He loves you, He wants nothing more than to do this for you. Trust Him and treat Him like He is a real person. Secondly, St. John of the Cross says: “Never take others for your example in the tasks you have to perform, however holy they may be, for the devil will set their imperfections before you. But imitate Christ, who is supremely perfect and supremely holy, and you will never err. (Sayings of Light and Love, 157)” In your discernment don’t worry about whether or not you or your story “fits” the model. Look to Our Lord. Trust Our Lord. When He opens a door, boldly enter it and follow. Don’t look back and don’t second guess Him.

While there are many excellent online sources, I would warmly and fraternally encourage a young man who is serious about growing in his spiritual life to spend less time online and more time with Our Lord. St. Teresa of Jesus teaches us that “All things are passing” (even the internet), “God never changes. (Lines Written in her Breviary)” Give yourself to the Changeless One! The Gospel according to St. Mark and the writings of Br. Lawrence of the Resurrection are my favorite “go-to”s.